/ @ade3
August 4, 2018

Unchecked Depression Boxes

"No family medical history we need to be aware of?"


"And are you feeling depressed?"

"Nope. All good."

Why should that question enrage me so much? I realize depression is a major health epidemic. I understand that they can't treat an invisible disease without asking if you are suffering from it. But all I want is to get a wart frozen off the bottom of my foot so I can get back to running. And I have to endure dumb questions like,

"And are you feeling depressed?"

Something itchy is contained in that question. The fake-friendly tone, the detachment, the soulless checklist requesting intimacy. The empty check box waiting to be acknowledged with ink. How dare you?

"And are you feeling depressed?"

What alarm bells would get sounded if I replied with anything but no? Would they prescribe drugs? Recommend therapy? Would my name get added to a watch list? More fake concern, more soulless checklists? I would rather not know.

"And are you feeling depressed?"

I have a non-traditional view of depression. I believe in a scale with euphoria on one end and depression on the other. I bounce back and forth along the scale depending on the ratio of boosters and drainers in my life. I suppose if I were to slip off the low end of the scale that's when things get dangerous. And maybe that’s what the nurse was asking.

"And are you feeling depressed?"

There’s value in estimating where you are at on your booster-drainer scale. What are the things that are missing that deplete your creative energy? What is fueling your ambition to work evenings and weekends? Being aware of what pushes and pulls you along the spectrum is the best advice I can give to anyone hoping to keep the depression box unchecked.

Thanks for reading. Stay creative.

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